With You, I'm Alone
by ytsgrl
Summary: Brooke Davis and Lucas Scott have a complicated history complete with drugs, deceit, and now a baby? Can they find their way back to each other or will their lives just never be the same? I changed the summary a couple times, sorry. Slightly AU.
1. Chapter 1

_**Author's Note: Ok, so this idea sort of sprang on me. It's AU, I mean, it has the same characters with sort of the same personalities, but their backgrounds are definitely diferent. I don't really know how or why I came up with this, but I did and I felt compelled to put it out there. To those of you who read The New Girl, don't worry, I'm still writing that one, but I'm gonna try to write this one too. We'll see how it goes. Please review! I need to know what you all think before I decide if I'm going to continue this or not! Thanks so much in advance! :)**_

**Chapter One**

Brooke Davis took a deep breath as she walked the streets of Paris. The air smelled musty, but not unpleasant. The aroma almost soothed her. It reminded her of where she was, and what she was doing there. The circumstances weren't ideal, but she was aware that they were necessary. Musty, but not unpleasant.

When she arrived at her home, she dropped her keys on the cabinet just inside the front door, slipping off her shoes to slide them underneath. She picked up the solitary piece of mail that was waiting for her and headed upstairs. She needed a long, hot bath.

As the water for her bath ran, Brooke undressed in front of the mirror and sighed, analyzing her newfound voluptuous curves. Her breasts were swollen to the size of small melons, C verging on D cup, a huge difference from her normally B cup sized breasts. Her skin was flawless at least. Even Brooke Davis had the occasional zit, but she hadn't seen one in ages. She smiled at that thought. No zits was definitely a perk.

Brooke turned to see where the water was in the bath tub and squeaked a little, realizing it was about to overflow. She hurried to it as fast as she could and bent, turning off the water and pulling the plug to drain it just a little bit, letting enough water out so that when she sank into the tub a few moments later, the water just narrowly escaped running over the sides.

She had to admit, this tub had been one of the reasons she had bought this house. With it's clawed feet and porcelain, it reminded her of the type of tub one of the heroines of those old black and white movies might bathe in. It made her feel glamorous. As if she were someone important. Well, some people would argue that she was important. She was the founder and president of Clothes Over Bros, one of the best known affordable clothing lines in the US and Europe to date.

Brooke smiled as she leaned her head back against the tub and began to relax, thinking of her clothing line. She prided herself on the term the press had coined for it. "Affordable luxurious clothing for women of all walks of life." Brooke wanted every woman in the world to be able to wear her clothes, not just the rich ones and she had managed to pull that off magnificently. Celebrities asked for it and soccer mom's bought it. She designed for Jennifer Lopez and Jane Homemaker. She loved being that person.

But she also loved her privacy so while she was President, CEO, and Founder of Clothes Over Bros, she was not the face of Clothes Over Bros and had she known she would be in the predicament that currently faced her when she started the company, she would have definitely kissed the person who thought of that idea.

No, the person who walked around the world pretending to be lead designer for Clothes Over Bros, the one who walked the red carpets and attended the movie premieres, she received death threats, marriage proposals, letters from fans and foes alike. She had no privacy, being photographed wherever she went from the grocery store to Beijing. Brooke didn't envy that woman at all. All the fame, all the glory, and none of the privacy. Brooke preferred privacy over fame and glory any day.

She sighed as she thought of her best friend Peyton Sawyer, the face of Clothes Over Bros. Poor Peyton, Brooke thought and then immediately retracted. No, Peyton wanted this life. Peyton asked for this life. Peyton was made for this life.

Peyton Sawyer and Brooke Davis had been born one day apart in a tiny town just off the coast of North Carolina called Tree Hill.

Peyton Elizabeth Sawyer was born to Larry and Anna Sawyer, a middle-class couple struggling from day to day to make ends meet. Larry was a tug boat captain and would often leave mother and daughter alone for months at a time going out to sea. Anna, a part time nurse, had to often hire a baby-sitter, leaving her young daughter with no parents to really raise her. No parents to teach her right from wrong. No parents to show her what real love truly was although it wasn't that they didn't love her, but in order to provide for her, they couldn't be there to show her they loved her.

Brooke was born to Mark and Victoria Davis, an extremely wealthy power couple who hadn't really wanted kids, but figured they should to carry on the family name and such. They had expected a boy to be named Mark Anthony Davis Jr. Instead, they had gotten Brooke Penelope Davis, a daughter who they neither wanted nor pretended to care about. She had grown up rich, beautiful and talented. Everything she touched seemed to turn golden. She dated the captain of the basketball team and they won a state championship. She became captain of the cheerleading squad and they won nationals. She wore an outfit and it was on the cover of Elle Magazine the very next week. She was the IT girl of Tree Hill, North Carolina and yet, she was truly and utterly alone. That was, until she met Peyton Sawyer.

She wasn't sure how she had never seen Peyton before that day. It wasn't like they hadn't attended the same pre-school, elementary school and junior high, but until the first Friday of their junior year of high school, Brooke didn't know Peyton existed.

It was probably more common than they realized. Two kids, growing up in the same small town but traveling in two completely different circles never meet. As a child, Brooke attended tea parties and arranged play dates. Peyton watched TV while her baby-sitter talked on the phone. Brooke performed in school talent shows. Peyton drew pictures in art class. Brooke became a cheerleader. Peyton had a webcam.

So on that fateful Friday of their junior year of high school when high school cheerleader Brooke Davis pulled out of her parking spot and narrowly avoided hitting Peyton Sawyer who was walking home from school, Brooke had no clue that Peyton would become her best friend let alone the face of Clothes Over Bros.

Even though Peyton insisted she was fine and that Brooke hadn't hurt her, Brooke insisted to give Peyton a ride home, or to the hospital, wherever she needed to go. Peyton argued and argued that she didn't need it but when Brooke set her mind to something, it was hard to change it so she accepted the ride home and was surprised to find both parents home when she got there.

"I can explain to your parents if you need me to." Brooke said when they pulled up in front of Peyton's dilapidated house, "That way they know who to bill if you have to go to the doctor or something."

"So you assume I can't even afford medical insurance?" Peyton raised her eyebrow at Brooke as if she were offended.

"Oh, no, I didn't mean it like that. I'm sorry, I just… I mean, if you needed money to cover anything. Um…" Brooke sputtered and stopped talking realizing she sounded horrible, "I'm sorry. I'm just used to my parents sort of fixing everything with money and I know it sounds horrible so I'll shut up and yeah… I'm really sorry."

"It's fine. No big deal." Peyton sighed, opening the door of the sky blue Beetle, "Thanks for the ride."

"Wait…" Brooke called out to the other girl, "I don't even know your name. Are you new to school?"

Peyton looked at Brooke like she was crazy and rolled her eyes.

"No, I'm not new to school. You, Brooke Davis and me, Peyton Sawyer, have attended every single grade together since Pre-K. I'm just not on your social radar I guess." Peyton laughed sarcastically, "Seriously, thanks for the ride but I gotta go."

Brooke was too stunned to say a word as Peyton walked away, through the gate blocking her yard, up the steps and into the house which Brooke was staring at. After a few minutes, when she realized that Peyton had disappeared and she felt like the biggest jackass in all eternity, Brooke huffed, turned off the car and strode to the front door. There had to be something she could do to make it up to this girl.

Knock. Knock. Knock.

Brooke tapped incessantly on the front door until Peyton finally answered it, frowning as she tried to hide the scene inside from Brooke but she was too slow to close the door. Brooke had already seen and heard Peyton's father screaming at Peyton's mother.

"What?" Peyton snapped when the door was closed behind her and she and Brooke were standing on the front porch, "Haven't you embarrassed me enough today?"

"Peyton, I'm sorry. I just wanted to make it up to you. I don't mean to sound like such a snobby bitch. I really don't. I just really didn't realize that we had gone to school together at all and I… I don't know. Are your parents fighting?"

"That's not really any of your business Brooke. You don't even know me!" Peyton exclaimed, "Please, go back to normal and leave me alone!"

"No Peyton!" Brooke called out to Peyton before the blonde could disappear inside her house again.

Peyton turned to Brooke and crossed her arms over her chest, tapping her foot impatiently, waiting for Brooke to say what she needed to say.

"It's just, maybe we have more in common than we realize." Brooke said quietly, "My parents fight like that too. All the time really, at least when they're in town anyway."

"Why do I care?" Peyton retorted, her arms still crossed.

"You don't I guess. I mean, you don't have any reason too it's just, sometimes I wonder if I'm the only one who has to deal with that. The screaming and the fighting and sometimes the hitting…" Brooke frowned, looking down at her designer shoes, "It might be nice to have someone to talk to that knows what it's like."

"My dad would never hit my mom." Peyton said simply, one arm falling to her side while the other stayed crossed, "But yeah… it might be nice to talk to someone."

"You um… you wanna get out of here? We could go get something to eat and just talk or something." Brooke offered, "My treat since I almost ran you over."

Peyton looked like she was contemplating it, staring at Brooke, trying to figure her out. What most people in Tree Hill didn't realize though was that Brooke Davis was not at all what she seemed.

"Yeah ok." Peyton nodded, taking a quick glance back at her house and shrugging before following Brooke back to the sky blue Beetle, "I doubt they realized I came home yet anyway."

"Don't you hate that?" Brooke exclaimed as they got into the car, "It's like Hello! I'm your daughter! Notice me please!"

"Exactly!" Peyton exclaimed back and the two began to chatter as Brooke pulled away from the house.

From that day forth they had been best friends. There wasn't a secret they didn't tell each other. When Peyton's parents finally divorced, Larry moved out and became even more engrossed in his work. Anna became withdrawn and so finally, when she graduated high school, she escaped, following Brooke to New York where Brooke began to sketch and eventually began her own clothing line.

Now here they were, three years from the day they had graduated high school. Peyton was the celebrity now leaving Brooke to be the one who faded into the background. Oh how the tides had changed.

Brooke's thoughts were interrupted by an incessant foot kicking her in her lung. She sighed, placing her hand over her ever growing pregnant belly.

"Ok, ok. We'll get out of the bath and go eat. Chill out."

Brooke struggled for a minute but eventually hefted herself out of the bathtub, grabbing a towel and drying off before wrapping herself in her luxurious bath robe and heading to her kitchen, searching the refrigerator for something edible, eventually settling on a turkey sandwich.

"Better?" Brooke asked her baby, again setting her hand on top of her stomach, "Food is good right?"

She received a triumphant kick right under her hand and felt validated in talking to her unborn child. Maybe her little boy or girl really could hear her in there.

She ate the sandwich, washing it down with a glass of water and then heading to her bedroom where she planned to bury herself in the covers and refuse to come out for days. Not that she needed to. The fall line was officially done.

The garments had been sent off for the final touches to be added, little stitches here and there. They would then be sent back to her for approval and then sent to Peyton, in New York, who would study them, getting to know them as if they were her own designs. Because when the runway show concluded, it would be Peyton thanking everyone for attending. It would be Peyton doing the interviews and attending the parties. It would be Peyton who would have to explain the influence of Paris and old world charm. Brooke would be relaxing in Paris, her baby would be a few weeks old at that point, and Brooke would have her hands full with a whole new project. Parenting.

"Now…" Brooke sighed, again speaking to her unborn baby, "If only your daddy could be here for it all."


	2. Chapter 2

_**Author's Note: Thanks so much for the reviews on the first chapter. This chapter answers your questions but there is still so much information that is left and a lot of background story to cover. Please let me know what you guys think. :)**_

**Chapter Two**

Peyton was trying to do too many things at once. Her iPhone was buzzing incessantly with a million unread messages. Her assistant was trying to confirm three different appearances at once. She had a flight out of Paris in exactly 4 hours which gave her exactly one and a half hours to get to the hospital to see her best friend and get out.

When Brooke had called the day before saying she was in labor, Peyton knew exactly what she needed to do so she did it. She canceled the rest of her days plans, jumped on the first flight out of New York, and was in Paris as fast as she could possibly be. Now here she was, thundering down the hallways of the hospital trying to get to Brooke as fast as she could but she knew she was already too late.

"Hi." Peyton peeked in the door of Brooke's hospital room and smiled when she saw the new mom cradling her newborn happily, "Oh my God Brooke."

Brooke turned to look at her best friend and grinned. She was so happy that her best friend had made it, even though she knew that meant things with the company were going undone.

Peyton pulled up a chair close to Brooke's bed and peered over at the tiny baby wrapped up in the baby blue blanket. She was surprised to see so much brown hair covering the little boy's head. She thought all babies were born bald.

"He's so beautiful Brooke. When was he born?" Peyton asked.

"He was born at 4:45 this morning. He weighs 8 pounds exactly and he is 19 inches long. Beautiful, healthy baby boy." Brooke was glowing, staring down at her baby. She was amazed that he had come from her. He was a piece of her, literally and though she was still nervous about being a mother, she knew she was going to do everything in her power to protect this little boy from the pain the world caused.

"He looks just like…"

"If you say he looks like his dad I'll kill you." Brooke said, cutting Peyton off.

Peyton frowned and looked over at her best friend, sighing.

"He keeps asking about you." Peyton said simply, "He's been trying to find you and he thinks I know where you are so he keeps asking me. He says he's clean now. Says he's been clean since you left."

Brooke sighed, shaking her head and turning her attention back to her son, trying her best not to start crying.

"He always says that Peyton." Brooke replied, "He always says he's clean but he never is. I was with him for 4 years and he was high for 3 of them. Don't believe a word he says to you Peyton."

"Brooke, I think he means it this time." Peyton insisted, "You should see him. He's holding a steady job, he's back in his college classes trying to get his degree. Don't count him out Brooke. He's working really hard to be worthy of you."

"Well, he can work for four years which is how long I worked to be with him." Brooke seemed upset but the moment she looked down at her son her expression calmed, "Our son deserves better than that. I deserve better than that."

"You're right Brooke. I'm sorry." Peyton smiled again at her best friend, "So can I hold him?"

"Of course." Brooke shifted and handed the baby over to Peyton who very carefully moved him to cradle him in her arms, "You're already his favorite aunt."

"I'm the only one who knows about him." Peyton retorted with a slight chuckle, as she started to talk to the baby who was staring up at her with interest, "Hi buddy. You are so handsome you know that? And you have the best momma in the world. She loves you so much."

Brooke watched the two interact for awhile, smiling. She was very happy to have a healthy baby and extremely happy to have her best friend here to be the first of her friends to meet her son. She was still contemplating calling the rest of their group of friends, but so far she hadn't risked it. She didn't want any of them telling the baby's father where she was.

"What are you going to name him?" Peyton asked as the baby began to fall asleep in her arms, "Have you decided?"

"I'm wrestling with names right now. I like Blake." Brooke replied, "But I can't decide on a middle name and I want the whole name to mean something you know?"

"Well Brooke, I would love to help, but I would need to know what last name this little guy is going to have first." Peyton smiled at her best friend and then down at the baby she was holding, "Are we giving him his mommy's last name? Or are we giving him his daddy's last name?"

Brooke sighed loudly, her head falling back against her hospital room pillow. She groaned but she knew she was going to have to make this decision eventually. She wanted her son to know who his father was. She wanted her son to know about the family he was born a part of, but she wasn't so sure she wanted him to BE a part of it.

"Make up names for both." Brooke finally said, "What names sound good with Davis? What names sound good with Scott?"

Peyton smiled and began to think of names. Brooke looked up at the ceiling and started making a mental list of the names she liked.

"Blake is cute but I don't like it with either name, Davis or Scott." Peyton mused, "Jamie has Lucas's name as his middle name so it might be cute that this little guy has Nathan's name as his middle name. You have nothing against Nathan do you?"

"Of course I have nothing against Nathan. He can't help being Lucas's brother." Brooke winced just saying her ex-boyfriend's name, "I like the idea. What goes with Nathan as a middle name?"

The two of them sat, tossing around names for awhile. They ruled out Blake, Owen, Isaiah, Wyatt, Max, and Carter. Peyton suggested that she try to find a baby names book or website but Brooke didn't want to let her friend leave the room. She knew they had a limited time to hang out before Peyton left the country and Brooke was going to have to face motherhood once again, alone.

"Name him Cash." Peyton grinned, "Cash Nathan Davis? Cash Nathan Scott?"

"That sounds so vain. Like I'm obsessed with money." Brooke laughed, "What about Christopher? Christopher Nathan Scott? Christopher Nathan Davis?"

"I like Christopher. You can call him Chris…" Peyton suddenly frowned and shook her head no, "Chris Keller?"

"Eww!" They squealed together.

"Ok, um… Rhys? Parker? I don't know Peyton." Brooke frowned, "My poor baby boy is going to be unnamed."

"Dominick." Peyton said simply, "Dominick Nathan Scott? I like it. You can call him Dom or Nick."

"So I guess we're deciding on Scott." Brooke sighed, "I like Dominick I'm just not sold. Does he look like a Dominick to you?"

She stared over at her baby boy sleeping peacefully in Peyton's arms. Brooke frowned and shook her head. Peyton frowned as she looked at the baby and shook her head as well.

"I guess you're right." Peyton sighed too, "I don't know Brooke. Let's resort to the internet please. I can come up with much better names if I look online."

"Ok fine." Brooke nodded and reached out for the baby, "Give me my son and you use the internet."

"Ok." Peyton grinned and handed the baby back to Brooke who cooed him back to sleep easily while Peyton took up residence on the edge of the bed and began to surf the web on her iPhone.

After about 30 minutes they had come up with a list.

"I'll read them all and then we will rule them out one by one ok?" Peyton read out loud, "Giovanni, Calum, Maddox..."

"Oh how very Angelina of me." Brooke giggled.

"Shut up and listen to the list." Peyton scolded, "Alexander, Joshua, Matthew, Liam, Chase, Sebastian, Mason, Bryce, Jonah, Colton, Tyler, Christian…"

"I like Tyler." Brooke stared down at her son who stirred a little and buried himself further into her arms, "Tyler Nathan Scott. I can call him Ty like the yummy carpenter from Extreme Home Makeover."

"Do you watch a lot of TV now that you live in France?" Peyton questioned with a grin, "Too much time on your hands?"

Brooke laughed but inside she nodded. She did have too much time on her hands. Or at least she did until she had a baby. She had a feeling everything was about to change drastically.

"Tyler is a good name." Peyton agreed finally, "Tyler Nathan Scott. I like it. Are we deciding officially?"

"We are." Brooke gave her final ok with a quick nod as she leaned down to kiss her baby boy's head softly, "Baby Ty."

"Turn him so I can take a picture with my phone. I have to send it to Nate and Haley." Peyton got her phone ready but Brooke shielded Tyler from her view.

"They will show Lucas and I can't do that right now Peyton." Brooke refused to let Lucas have any part of her sons life at that point, "If he knows you took the picture then he will never leave you alone until you tell him where I am and if you tell him where I am I have to deal with him all over again and I'm not ready to do that."

"I told you Brooke. He's clean. He's not doing drugs anymore. He stopped."

"Who told you that huh? Did Lucas tell you that? Because Peyton, he lies. He's a junkie and he lies. I know this better than anyone. I dealt with it! I lived it! Peyton, please. I'm begging you not to tell anyone about Tyler."

Peyton was pouting. She didn't like the idea of keeping this huge secret from all her friends. She could understand not wanting Lucas to know because of the issues Brooke and he had gone through but keeping it from Nathan and Haley was going to be hard. They were the best parents and they would be great as an aunt and uncle. Jamie would be a terrific cousin and all because of Lucas's screw ups they wouldn't get that chance. Peyton was starting to understand Brooke's resentment of Lucas.

"Ok. I'll keep him a secret Brooke, but for how long? When are you coming home?"

"I don't know Peyt." Brooke sighed, "I guess I'm coming home when it stops being hard."

"It's always going to be hard." Peyton replied softly, "You know that."

"Then maybe I just won't ever come home."


	3. Chapter 3

**_Author's Note: Thank you all so much for the wonderful reviews. I am so glad you like the name Tyler. I had such a hard time picking it out. It was like I was naming my own baby! LOL Anyway, here is the next chapter. I know it's hard to see Lucas as an addict, but hopefully this chapter will help a little and it gives some more background so maybe it will enlighten a little bit as to how they got to where they are now. I'll really appreciate if you all keep reviewing. It keeps me motivated! Enjoy! :)_**

**Chapter Three**

After three knocks on the door, she was considering leaving. She tried again, tapping almost incessantly on the door then stuffing her hands back in her pockets and rocking back and forth from heel to toe. His car was here. He had to be home. So why wasn't he answering the door?

"Peyton?"

Peyton turned around to see who had called her name and she smiled when she saw him. Lucas Eugene Scott, in all his glory, standing at the bottom of the stairs while she stood at the top. He was frowning at her, but not a frown like he was mad, but a frown that showed he hadn't expected to see her standing at his front door. Normally she simply fielded his phone calls through a secretary.

"Hey." Peyton ran down the stairs and hugged him tightly, "I missed you. How are you?"

"I'm good." Lucas replied squeezing her tight and then letting her go, taking a step back to look at her, "You look great Peyton. Running Clothes Over Bros looks good on you."

"I don't really run it." Peyton laughed, "Brooke does. I'm just the face of it all."

Lucas nodded and instinctively bit his lower lip, not sure what to say. He knew if he asked about Brooke she wouldn't tell him anything. He also knew if he didn't ask she would think something was wrong.

"How is she? She should have had…" He couldn't bring himself to mention the baby he knew they had been expecting when she left him. It hurt too much to know that she was keeping his child from him.

"She's good." Peyton nodded excitedly, "I just got back from seeing her actually. That's why I'm here um… can we go inside?"

"Yeah." Lucas nodded, a small glimmer of hope suddenly rising inside him. Maybe Peyton was going to tell him something after all. Maybe after all these months he would be able to find Brooke and their child. He had been looking for them since the moment she walked out on him 7 months earlier.

Lucas led Peyton inside the house that used to be his mothers, closing the door behind him as he reached to pull open the blinds, allowing light to flood into the living room. He squinted, having just been outside and not expecting the light to affect him that much.

"So how are you? Last time we talked you said you were in college, working on your degree. You were clean." Peyton was grinning at Lucas, "Are you still clean?"

"Yeah." Lucas nodded, shoving his hands into his pockets much like the pose he had found Peyton in a few minutes ago, "Six months and counting. I quit college though. I guess I just didn't feel like I was learning anything so um… I started writing a novel. Sort of an auto-biography that's slightly fictionalized."

"That's great Luke." Peyton reached out and ran her hand down Lucas's bicep, "I'm really proud of you Lucas. I know I'm not around that much anymore but I just want you to know that I still consider you my friend and I'm here for you, you know?"

"Thanks Peyton." Lucas inhaled deeply, "So, you said you came here about Brooke?"

He couldn't help the happiness that began to rise towards his heart. He had tried everything he could think of to find Brooke over the last 7 months. He had tried calling Clothes Over Bros headquarters and asking for her, but they always put him through to Peyton. He had tried hiring a private investigator but the guy had taken his money and returned no results. He had tried internet searches and he had tried grilling their mutual friends for information, but nothing had worked. If Peyton was finally going to tell him where Brooke was, he was officially going to be the happiest man alive.

"Yeah, I…" Peyton grinned, "I just saw her and she had the baby. It's a boy."

Lucas's heart began to swell. He had a son. He and Brooke had a son together.

"Oh my God Peyton, thank you so much." Lucas pulled his hands out of his pockets and wrapped them around Peyton in a bear hug, not realizing that when he did a small vial that had been stored in his jeans pocket fell out, landing between him and Peyton on the floor, "So, what did she name him? She named him already right? Where is she? I want to see her."

Peyton and Lucas pulled apart, smiles plastered to both of their faces and Peyton was about to begin answering his questions when she saw the vial at her feet. There wasn't much in it, but it was enough to know he had lied to her. The white powder didn't just appear from nowhere.

She let her smile fall as she bent down to pick it up and then glared at Lucas as she held it in front of his face. His smile fell too as he grabbed the vial from her hand and stuffed it back in his pocket.

"Peyton, I can explain."

"No need." Peyton sighed, adjusting her purse on her shoulder as she turned to leave, "Brooke was right. You were lying. You lied to my face."

"No, no." Lucas reached out and placed his hand on the door just as Peyton reached for the handle. Leaning into it, she wasn't able to open the door as he grabbed her arm and spun her around, "I'm not using. I promise Peyton, please. Where is Brooke?"

"What's the container then Luke? If you're not using, what is that? Powdered sugar?" She laughed sarcastically, "I can't believe I fell for it. Now I know why she left. Finally, I understand what Brooke dealt with for three years with you. The lying. The pain. I wanted to tell you about your son Lucas. I wanted to. She asked me not to and I was going to tell you anyway because I believed you and then…"

Peyton took a deep breath and stared straight into Lucas's eyes.

"Did you like growing up without knowing your father Lucas? Did you like not knowing if your dad loved you and if he did, why he wasn't there? Why he didn't go to your little league games? Why he never sent cards on your birthday? Did you like your mom being sad?"

Lucas eyes' began to water as Peyton continued on.

"When you met Dan, and Nathan, did you like knowing that you didn't matter to your dad as much as something else had? Let me tell you Lucas. Your son is going to wonder the same things. He's going to wonder why he can't see his dad. He's going to wonder if you love him. He's gonna watch his mom be sad until maybe, just maybe, one day he'll meet you and he'll be old enough to understand that drugs meant more to you than he did."

"No." Lucas let the tears fall down his face freely, "They don't. I want to know him. I want to be there. She took that away from me."

"Brooke left because you couldn't give up your drugs." Peyton shrugged, "Guess some things never change right? Like father like son?"

Lucas took a step away from her, the words stinging as she said them. As soon as he did, she opened the door and left, no further words, not even a goodbye. Lucas was left standing in his living room crying, clutching the solitary vial of cocaine in his hand. He looked down at it and immediately threw it as far as he could away from him. It landed in a potted plant in the corner and he walked away, sniffling as he headed for his bedroom to lay down.

What Peyton had said really resonated with him. She was right. He knew it and she had known it when she said it.

Lucas thought about growing up with his mom in this house and the questions he had asked her about his dad. He remembered wondering if his dad loved him. He remembered the first day that "the other Scott's" had moved into town and everyone began whispering. He had seen how sad his mom was every time she had to see Dan, Deb, and Nathan happy together. That's how he had known that Dan Scott was his father. No one had told him, he just instinctively knew.

It had hurt him when he realized that Dan clearly loved his new family more than he had loved Lucas and Karen. He had finally gotten the courage to ask Karen and when she told him the truth, that his dad had been there for his birth but left shortly thereafter, he was devastated. He didn't want his son to think that anything had kept him from being a good dad. He didn't want his son to grow up feeling the way he had felt towards Dan.

Having left Lucas alone with his thoughts, Peyton wasn't sure where to go. She didn't have to be back in New York for another couple of days. She wanted to see Nathan, Haley, and Jamie but right now she was so angry with Lucas she wasn't sure she could face them without having to talk about the whole situation. She decided to go to the only place she knew of where she could sit and clear her thoughts, the river court.

When she arrived there she smiled, seeing the new batch of boys growing up playing on the court. She recognized a few to be the younger brothers of people she had gone to school with a few years ago. Some she didn't recognize at all. One of them she knew, very well.

"Peyton Sawyer…" Nathan Scott jogged off the court smiling at her while she took a seat at the picnic table nearby, "Wait? Am I hallucinating? It can't really be Peyton Sawyer, the face of Clothes Over Bros, can it be?"

"Shut up." Peyton rolled her eyes and pushed him as he took a seat next to her.

Nathan laughed and turned to hug her and she hugged him back.

"Missed you Sawyer. It's been what? Two years since you graced us with your presence?"

"I call." Peyton defended herself, "I'm just busy so I can't get here as often as I'd like."

"Well yeah, at least you call." Nathan agreed, "More than I can say for Brooke."

Peyton snapped her head to look him directly in the eyes and glare at him.

"Brooke is going through a lot right now. Cut her some slack."

"Ok, sorry." Nathan held up his hands in surrender and backed away from Peyton a little bit, "Didn't realize anyone was talking to her. I thought you would be pissed she hadn't called you either."

"I just got back from seeing her." Peyton sighed, "I mean, I kind of have to see her every once in awhile right? Clothes Over Bros is her company."

"True enough." Nathan nodded and they sat silent for a minute, Peyton not knowing what to say and Nathan not wanting to upset her anymore than he already had, "Did she have the baby?"

Peyton nodded in response to the question as she stared off into the distance. She didn't elaborate. She wasn't supposed to tell anyone about Tyler and she had already messed up by telling Lucas the minor details.

"Is it a boy? Girl? Healthy?" Nathan questioned slowly, trying to get Peyton to look at him again, "Do we get to know anything?"

"Not really." Peyton sighed, turning to him, "Brooke asked me not to tell anyone. I was going to tell you and Haley but she said you would tell Lucas and then I was going to solve that problem by telling Lucas myself because I thought he was doing better, but when I went to tell him he had cocaine on him, so I realized that he was lying to me and didn't tell him anything else."

"He's using again?" Nathan took a deep breath and nodded, turning so that he was now the one staring off into the distance, "Damn it. We were so sure this time… Haley's gonna be upset."

"Aren't we all?" Peyton sighed scooting closer to Nathan and laying her head on his shoulder, "How did this happen Nathan? I mean, we all have so much history. How did we drift so far apart? How did Lucas start using drugs? How did Brooke move to…"

Peyton stopped realizing that she had almost given away Brooke's location. She groaned and threw her head into her hands.

"I hate keeping secrets from my friends!" She exclaimed loudly.

"Peyton…" Nathan reached over and let his hand run lightly across the small of her back comfortingly, "Listen, I know Brooke is trying to keep Lucas away and she thinks that Haley and I are going to give away her secrets. I can understand that. Lucas is Haley's best friend and he's my brother, but if he's using again, I promise we aren't going to tell him anything. If anything, I've been Brooke's friend longer than I've accepted Lucas as my brother."

Peyton nodded, knowing that he had a point. Nathan and Lucas had only started to get to know each other during senior year of high school, after Nathan and Haley had started dating and Brooke and Lucas had started dating. Other than Brooke's friendship with Peyton starting in junior year, the circles of popularity and non-popularity had never mixed before than.

"She had a boy." Peyton grinned at Nathan, "Healthy. 8lbs and 19 in long. She sort of named him after you."

"Really?" Nathan grinned back at her.

"Yeah, well like you and Haley gave Jamie his uncle's name for his middle name, Brooke gave Tyler your name as his middle name."

"Tyler? Tyler Nathan…" Nathan let his eyebrows raise, clearly questioning but not speaking his question.

"Scott." Peyton nodded, "Tyler Nathan Scott. If Brooke finds out I told you she will kill me so please for the love of god, do not tell Lucas ok?"

"I promise." Nathan hugged her to his side, "I honestly don't know what to do with Lucas anymore. I don't feel comfortable letting him be around Jamie. He can't play basketball worth a shit anymore and it's awkward just talking to him, so we barely hang out. I think the smartest thing Brooke ever did was getting away from him. I thought it had woken him up but, apparently I was wrong."

The two of them sat in silence for a little while, the game still going on in front of them the only sound.

"You should come over and see Haley. She's going to be really excited to see you." Nathan finally broke the silence, "And Jamie too. With you and Brooke gone, he's really missed his favorite aunts."

Peyton grinned and nodded.

"Yeah, I'm in town for a couple of days so I would love to spend some time with him."

"Well, let's get out of here. Haley's probably making dinner anyway and I am starved." Nathan stood and offered his hand to Peyton to help her up, "Drive me? I jogged here but it's easier to drive home."

"Yeah, of course." The two of them climbed into her car and chatted idly while they drove the few minutes back to Haley and Nathan's house.

Peyton parked in the driveway of Nathan and Haley's house and sighed, remembering what it felt like to live in a real house instead of a condo in a high rise in New York City. It was times like these that she missed living in a small town.

"Settlement money is excellent." Nathan joked as he caught Peyton staring at the house.

"Settlement money?" Peyton questioned, unsure of what Nathan was referring to.

"Yeah. We bought this house with the money we got from the NBA after I got injured." Nathan frowned at Peyton, "You don't remember that?"

After Nathan's freshman year in college, he had decided to make himself eligible for the NBA draft. He was good enough. Several NBA teams had already expressed interest in him and so as the NBA draft approached, he became the 7 NBA draft pick, going to the San Antonio Spurs. He, Haley, and their then 1 year old son moved to San Antonio and prepared to start a new life.

It was midway into his rookie season when, playing against the New York Knicks, a player on the opposite team had dealt him a foul that sent him flying across the court, crashing into the announcers table and knocking him out cold. He had been hospitalized for several weeks with bruising to his spinal cord and a concussion. Because of the spinal cord injury the NBA didn't want him to come back and play which meant they had to pay him a settlement, which ended up being an amount of money which could have provided a comfortable life for Nathan, Haley and Jamie for ten years, easily.

"No, I do." Peyton smacked her hand to her head, "Of course I do. Sorry. I'm just a little spacey today. So you were playing basketball today though. You're all recovered?"

"For the most part." Nathan grinned, "Come on. I'll tell you about it after you come inside and see Haley."

Peyton followed Nathan up to the front door and inside the house, observing her surroundings and once again finding herself wishing she was back here, living in Tree Hill, instead of the life she had carved out being the face of Clothes Over Bros.

"Nathan? Is that you?" Haley called out from somewhere inside the house.

"Yeah, it's me!" Nathan called back, smiling at Peyton, "I brought a visitor home with me!"

"Really? Who?" Haley stepped out from around a corner just as Nathan and Peyton were approaching.

As soon as she saw Peyton her eyes lit up and she quickly took the apron off that she was wearing and then ran to Peyton, hugging her tight.

"Oh my God Peyton, I missed you so much!" Haley squeezed Peyton and then took a step back, looking her friend over, "You are too damn skinny. Come on. I'm making dinner."

The three of them headed to the kitchen where Haley went back to cooking and both Nathan and Peyton sat down on stools at the counter.

"Where's Jamie?" Nathan asked as he looked around for his three year old son.

"Napping." Haley replied happily, "You can go wake him up if you want. It's time anyway."

"K, I'll be right back." Nathan slipped from his stool and headed upstairs to wake his son leaving the two women alone in silence.

Peyton was happy to see Haley, and Nathan, and soon Jamie too. She loved hanging out with them. They had so much love between the three of them. They were so kind to each other. They cared for each other's happiness. It made Peyton want a family of her own, even though she knew that wouldn't be happening anytime soon.

"So what brings you to Tree Hill?" Haley finally asked, looking over at Peyton who had at one time been one of her closest friends.

"Um…" Peyton had already told Nathan so she knew she might as well tell Haley at this point, "Brooke had the baby, so I came to tell Lucas, but uh… that didn't go over so well."

"Brooke had the baby?" Haley lit up again, "That's awesome! I didn't know you still talked to her. Did you get to see the baby? Were you there with her when she went into labor?"

"I got there too late for the labor, but I did get to see the baby and help name him." Peyton smiled, "Tyler Nathan Scott."

"Tyler…that's a great name." Haley grinned, "Did you tell Nathan?"

"I did. He was happy when he heard Tyler had his name for a middle name." Peyton laughed.

"That is so cool. So, why didn't it go over well with Lucas? He's been doing everything he can to find her so he could be there when the baby was born."

"Well…" Peyton sighed, wishing she didn't have to be the one to tell Haley her best friend had relapsed and started using drugs again, "I was all set to tell him and then I found…"

"Aunt Peyton!" Jamie came running towards Peyton and clung to her leg before Peyton could finish her sentence.

"Jamie!" Peyton stood from her stool and scooped Jamie up in her arms, placing playful kisses all over his face and neck making him giggle happily, "I missed you buddy. How old are you now? 13? 14?"

"I'm three!" Jamie held up three fingers to indicate his age.

"Three? No way! You are way to grown up to be three. You have to be at least seven."

"Nope, I'm three." Jamie giggled, "But my birthday is coming up soon. Are you gonna come to my party?"

"You're birthday isn't for another six months Jamie." Haley laughed and rolled her eyes, "He's been saying his birthday is coming up since the day after his last birthday."

Peyton smiled and turned her attention back to Jamie.

"You send me an invitation and I'll be there ok?"

"You promise?" Jamie held out his pinkie so Peyton would have to pinkie promise him.

Peyton nodded and hooked her pinkie into his.

"I promise."

Jamie slid down and ran out of the room back upstairs yelling to Nathan that Peyton was coming to his birthday party.

"He's so crazy." Haley remarked, turning back to Peyton as Peyton regained her stool at the counter, "So um… what were you about to say about Lucas?"

"Oh um… I found cocaine." Peyton sighed, looking to make sure Jamie wasn't around when she said it, "It fell out of his pocket just before I told him about Tyler and so I didn't tell him."

Haley's mouth had fallen open and Peyton could see a tear start to well up in her eye. Peyton hated being the person to tell Haley this type of thing. She hated that Lucas would disappoint his best friend like this.

"But…" Haley gulped, trying to hold back her tears, "He promised me. He… Peyt, I told him if he relapsed this time I wasn't going to let him see Jamie anymore."

"Oh Hales…" Peyton slipped from her stool and went around the counter to give her friend a hug, "I'm so sorry. I wish that I hadn't seen what I saw. I really, really do."

Haley sniffled and buried her head into Peyton's shoulder.

"Jamie's going to be heartbroken if I don't let him see Lucas anymore." She groaned through her tears, "How do I explain that to a three year old?"

"What's wrong momma?" Jamie asked, suddenly appearing as he pulled himself up onto one of the barstools. He was clearly worried that he had discovered his mom crying.

"Nothing baby." Haley quickly straightened and wiped her tears away, "I'm just really happy that Aunt Peyton is here. It's been a long time since I saw her."

"You cry when you're happy?" Jamie seemed puzzled at the idea and he turned to Nathan who had just rejoined them, "Why does momma cry when she's happy?"

"I don't know buddy." Nathan frowned at Haley who sniffled once more and shook her head, signaling to Nathan that she couldn't talk about it with Jamie there. "Jamie, let's go play basketball until momma has dinner ready ok?"

"Ok!" Jamie took off with Nathan to the back yard leaving the girls to be able to discuss what they had previously been discussing.

"I just can't believe it Peyt." Haley sighed, going back to her food while Peyton returned to her stool, "Why would he start using again? Things are good. He's writing a book. He quit college but that was supposed to be a good thing and… I just don't understand it. Why is he doing this?"

Peyton couldn't answer Haley's questions. She had no idea why he was doing it. She wished she did know so that she knew how to stop him. She had desperately wanted today to be the day that he learned of his son and made steps towards winning Brooke back and instead he had taken steps backwards.

The doorbell rang and Haley sighed, removing her apron and leaving Peyton in the kitchen while she went to answer the door. When Haley hadn't returned after a few minutes she reached over to stir the food on the stove and then went to check on Haley.

"No Lucas, you need to leave." Haley tried to close the door but Peyton saw Lucas reach in and prop the door open with his hand.

"Haley please, Peyton was wrong about what she saw. You don't understand." Lucas pleaded.

"You're lying Luke!" Haley exclaimed, "You are lying and I don't even know if you realize when you're lying anymore. You're high now Lucas. I'm not stupid. I've seen this with you too many times not to recognize the symptoms."

Peyton reached Haley and swung the door open to stare at Lucas who was standing there, staring at them, his eyes bloodshot, jumping from foot to foot and using his right hand to scratch his left arm. Peyton recognized the symptoms too. She had been there before. She used to act just like that but she hated seeing Lucas like this.

"You should leave Lucas." Peyton hugged Haley to her side for moral support, "I don't think Haley wants you here."

"How would you know?" Lucas spat at Peyton, "You haven't even been around for two years. You don't care about her, or me, or our family."

"Your family?" Peyton practically laughed in his face, "You don't care about your family Lucas or you wouldn't keep doing this to them."

Lucas glared at her.

"You're the one who made me like this. You started this."

Peyton glared back at him. She knew he would attack her with that claim eventually. He was right. She had been the person to give him his very first dose of cocaine, three years ago, just after they graduated high school.

They were at a party, the five of them, Brooke, Lucas, Peyton, Haley and Nathan. Haley and Nathan were more interested in getting home early to their newborn son and Brooke was dealing with the beginning stages of Clothes Over Bros, which had left Peyton and Lucas to their own devices. Peyton had been using cocaine socially for over a year already and so she had found someone with it and given Lucas some too. She regretted that decision every day since, because while she had reformed and hadn't used cocaine for over two years, he had become addicted.

"You're right Lucas. It is my fault you are this way so let me help you. Let me take you to where I rehabbed. Let me…"

"No!" Lucas screamed, "I don't need your help Peyton. I don't need any of you."

He turned to leave and Haley began crying, clutching to Peyton for strength as she watched her best friend walk away. Instinctively she knew that this was the last time he would walk away from her. There was nothing else she could do to help him.

"Shh…" Peyton led Haley back into the house, shutting the door behind them, "It's gonna be okay. Lucas will realize one day what he's done and then it will all fall into place."

Peyton spoke the words but deep down, she wasn't sure she believed them. She wanted to believe them, but something told her it was going to take something much more drastic to wake Lucas up from his drugged out delirium. It was going to take a miracle.


	4. Chapter 4

_**Author's Note: I'm so sorry that it's taken me so long to update this story. I was writing and finishing this other story I've been working on for like four years and starting the sequel to it so I deeply apologize for my lack of attention to this one. I'm honestly not sure how I feel about this chapter. I like the concept but I'm iffy on the execution so I hope you all like it. Please give me honest reactions and maybe if I screwed something up I can fix it in a coming chapter. Anyway, I'll just let you read and judge for yourselves. Enjoy :)**_

**Chapter Four**

"Come on Ty, we have one more stop before we're going home. I know you're tired sweetheart."

Brooke sighed as her two year old son stopped walking, crossing his arms and glaring at her defiantly. The other patrons on the street walked around him, smiling at her sympathetically, but she just groaned and headed back towards him, setting her shopping bags on the table near where he was standing before she squatted down to be at his level.

"Please walk with mommy. One more stop?"

Tyler shook his head no, his blonde locks flying back and forth with the movement. He stared up at Brooke with his baby blue eyes and she frowned.

"What if I carry you?"

He smiled, revealing his deep dimples. The dimples were the one physical trait he seemed to have gotten from his mother. Other than that, she reminisced every day about how much he looked like Lucas.

"Alright, come here." Brooke hoisted Tyler into her arms and managed to balance him and her shopping bags, walking the block until she made it to her last stop of the day.

"Brooke!" The shop owner grinned when she saw her come in, "You look like you have your hands full. Here, I'll put your bags behind the counter while you shop."

"Thank you so much." Brooke grinned, handing all her bags over so she could concentrate just on holding Tyler, "How's business?"

"Great. We have a big book signing tomorrow and it's bringing huge business into the store of people buying copies of the book." Brooke followed the woman who had become her friend over the years since she'd moved to Paris towards the counter, "I hear it's a very good book. Maybe you're interested?"

The shop owner handed Brooke the book and as soon as she read the title and author's name, Brooke fell silent, her mouth falling open. She set Tyler on the counter so she could get a better look as she opened it up and read the back sleeve.

"Lucas Scott graduated high school five years ago at the top of his class and with the world at his feet. He spent three years fighting his addiction to cocaine and another two years rehabbing that addiction and writing his first novel. He's a proud uncle to his five year old nephew and lives in Tree Hill, North Carolina with his dog Ninja." Brooke glared at the back sleeve of that book hoping that if she stared at it long enough it would disappear.

"He's from the same place you are no?"

Brooke snapped her head up to look at her friend and she nodded slowly.

"Did you know him?"

"I thought I did." Brooke closed her eyes and took a deep breath, "So he's going to be here tomorrow you said right?"

"Yes, we're very excited."

"Well I will take this book and give me a few minutes to pick some out for Tyler okay?"

"Of course. Take your time."

Brooke and Tyler wandered the store for an hour, eventually picking out a few books that were age appropriate for a two year old and then heading back to the counter to check out. With another bag in her hand, Brooke groaned as she left the store carrying Tyler again as they headed home.

"Read me." Tyler immediately pulled one of his books out of the bag and handed it to Brooke when they were safely in the house, "Pease?"

Brooke couldn't help but smile at his request, despite all the confusion which was littering her thoughts at that moment. More than anything she wanted to take Lucas's book upstairs and read it to find out exactly what it was about. His mini-bio said he had spent two years recovering from cocaine addiction. She wondered if that was a coincidence or if Peyton had told him about Tyler, but if she had told him about Tyler than Nathan and Haley would have known and someone of the three of them would have tried to contact her, wouldn't they? And Peyton hadn't said anything to her about any of them knowing so it had to be a coincidence that he claimed to be sober for as long as her son had been alive, right?

"Momma! Read me!" Tyler demanded attention and Brooke snapped out of her thoughts, taking the book from his hand.

"Alright kid, go sit on the couch. I'm gonna get us a snack and I'll be there in two seconds okay?"

"Okay."

Tyler ran towards the living room and Brooke quickly pulled together a plate of apples and grapes with some cheese and yogurt then headed to join him where he was actually sitting patiently on the couch waiting for her.

"You have to be the best behaved two year old in the world you know that?"

Tyler nodded.

"Okay, let's read the book. I Love You All Day Long by Francesca Rusackas." Brooke went through the book and read the simple text, showing Tyler the pictures of the pigs in the story as she went.

"Pig!" Tyler pointed out to the little boy pig in the story.

"Yep, that is a pig." Brooke smiled at him and continued to read.

She was only halfway done with the book when she realized he had fallen asleep, a slice of apple still clutched in his little hand. The fact that it was naptime hadn't escaped her as she closed the book and took the apple from his hand gently, moving everything so she could stand up and then pick him up to take him to his bed upstairs.

When she had tucked him in, made sure his favorite stuffed animal was tucked in next to him, and kissed his forehead, Brooke headed back downstairs, grabbing her cell phone from her purse, Lucas's book from the book store bag, and heading back for the couch.

"Peyton's phone." Peyton's assistant answered Peyton's cell phone and Brooke sighed.

"Hi Gianna, it's Brooke. Is Peyton available?"

"For you she is. One second."

Brooke was put on hold and while she waited she looked began thumbing through the pages of the book, wondering again what it was about. It then occurred to her that she could read the back cover and find out what it was about, something she was sure she would have thought about earlier had she not been so surprised by it.

"If one moment could change your entire life, would you realize it when it happened or would it go by, without even a sliver of recognition?" Brooke read the first line of the description out loud and sighed, "Lucas Scott was just a boy when his life changed drastically. Suddenly faced with a father who abandoned him at birth and a brother he's never known, the boy Lucas is forced to live life in a small town where everyone knows more about his family then he knows himself. Entering high school in this same small town brings about changes to his life that he can't predict and isn't sure he's ready for."

"Hello?" Peyton finally got on the phone and Brooke snapped out of her reverie with the book in front of her.

"Oh hey. Hi." Brooke took a deep breath, "How's everything going?"

"I am super busy. I got your sketches though for the new line so we're putting together samples now so we'll have them to you by like Monday. Is that soon enough? I know we're running a little behind schedule but…"

"No, that's fine Peyton. I um, I didn't call to talk about work."

"Oh." Peyton seemed surprised, "Well, what's up?"

"Did you know Lucas wrote a book?"

Peyton stayed quiet for a minute, not sure how to answer this question.

"I… sort of. Um, I knew he was writing a book just after Tyler was born but I didn't really know anything else about it until I saw it in a book store about a week ago."

"Yeah, I didn't know anything else about it until I went into a bookstore today and found out he's going to be here, in Paris, tomorrow signing copies."

"Oh shit." Peyton took a deep breath this time and let it out slowly, "Well, um… he doesn't know you live there."

"Are you sure? Have you talked to him?"

"Not in a really long time." Peyton replied, "I called Haley when I saw the book though and she said he's doing a lot better. I guess he's doing a book tour for the book which would explain him being there tomorrow and um, it's supposed to be really good. Haley read it and she says we're all in it. It's like a coming of age story. Sort of explains some of his feelings about Dan and the way he felt about Nathan and how it all changed in senior year. It um, it even talks about you and Tyler, not like naming Tyler obviously but Haley said the story ends with him talking about you and the love he has for you and your son."

Brooke's eyes narrowed. Only two people in the world knew about Tyler as far as she knew and that was her and Peyton. She hadn't told Lucas he had a son so that meant…

"Peyton? How does Lucas know about Tyler?"

"He doesn't." Peyton said, "I told you he doesn't name him he just talks about his love for the son he doesn't know."

"Only you and me knew I had a baby boy Peyton. How does Lucas know I had a boy?" Brooke was already becoming impatient with her best friend which was not a good sign.

"Oh, that." Peyton groaned, "I may have, kind of told him. Um…"

"Peyton, I specifically asked you not to tell anyone about Tyler!"

"I know! I'm sorry!" Peyton countered quickly, "I thought he was better okay? I went to Tree Hill right after I saw you and I was going to tell Lucas everything which I know you asked me not to but I just… it was a bad idea and I know that now and I didn't tell him everything. I told him that you had a boy and then I found cocaine on him so I didn't tell him anything else. I'm sorry Brooke. I know that you asked me not to say anything and it was a mistake to tell Luke anything but…"

"There is no but to that sentence Peyton. You betrayed my trust. Did you tell Nate and Haley too?"

"Yeah." Peyton sighed, "Brooke, it's been two years now okay and they haven't said anything to Lucas and from what Haley says, he's doing really good! I mean, obviously he's doing good if he got a book published and…"

"And now that the book is published he'll have plenty of money for his habit." Brooke was really, really mad at Peyton and she feared that if she stayed on the phone much longer she was going to say things she would later regret, "I have to go Peyton. I cannot believe that you would do this to me. I have half a mind to fire you from Clothes Over Bros."

"Brooke, please don't be like that. I'm really sorry but it's not like it changed anything. You're still happily living in Paris and no one bothers you. You do your work, raise your son, and live your life! I didn't mess anything up for you!"

"He wrote it in his book Peyton. So if my son reads this book in the future, it's going to sound like it was my fault that Lucas doesn't know him. Like I kept them apart when it was Lucas's habit that kept them apart all along."

"Have you even read it Brooke? How do you know that's what it will seem like? Maybe Lucas admits everything. Haley said he didn't leave anything out. She said he talks about recovering from his addiction and so maybe he doesn't paint you to be the bad guy. How do you know?"

"Because he's never going to change Peyton!" Brooke threw the book across the room and it crashed loudly against the wall, "I have to go."

She didn't give Peyton a chance to respond. She hung up her phone and stared at the book, laying disheveled on the floor across the room. As she started to calm down she realized how loud her argument with Peyton had been. She headed upstairs to make sure it hadn't disturbed Tyler but found him still sleeping soundly, cuddled up with "bubby" the stuffed rabbit he had loved since infancy.

Brooke stared at him, watching his chest rise and fall with his breaths, and she began to cry. She didn't want him to grow up without his father, the way his father had grown up.

When she returned to the living room she picked up the book and smoothed the cover back over the hard bound pages. She sat down, finding a blanket to cover herself with and then she began to read, curious about what her ex-boyfriend could have possibly written in the 335 pages she held between her hands.

In three hours she was so enthralled in the pages she didn't even notice when Tyler was standing right in front of her, holding his "bubby" and watching her without making a sound. It wasn't until she pulled herself from the pages to look up at the clock that she realized he was there and she jumped, clutching her chest as she thought her heart was going to come burst.

"Ty, don't scare mommy like that. I almost had a heart attack." Brooke set the book aside and pulled Tyler up into her arms, cuddling him and kissing his forehead, "You have a good nap?"

Tyler nodded and leaned his head over onto her shoulder. This was Brooke's favorite time of the day. When he woke from a nap he was always cuddly and she treasured this more and more as he got older. She knew it would only be a little longer before he started being too old to cuddle with his mom and she wasn't looking forward to that age.

At two, he was definitely starting to explore the "terrible two's" stage that everyone warned her about, but she was finding that she was liking this age more than dreading it. He was exploring his independence, potty training, speaking more and more every day and she loved seeing more of his personality shine through.

"Book." Tyler pointed to the book she had set down and tried to reach for it.

"That's momma's book Ty." Brooke picked it up and smiled.

"Read me." Tyler smiled at her and waited for her to read to him, "Pease?"

"No, not this book sweetheart." Brooke folded down the page she had stopped at which happened to be the beginning of the relationship between herself and Lucas then shut the book and set it to the side, "You wanna do something else? We can play a game or go outside and play in the yard…"

Tyler shook his head no and reached for the book again.

"Read me."

Brooke groaned and opened the book to where she had folded down the page. She knew her major weakness as a mother was not being able to say no. She hoped her son's weakness would be not understanding what she was reading on the page.

"Brooke Davis was a cheerleader. The queen bee of a world I wanted nothing to do with and yet she intrigued me more than even she realized at the time because beyond being a cheerleader, she was beautiful with a vulnerability she tried desperately to hide from the world. But I saw it."

She continued reading aloud but soon Tyler lost interest and headed off on his own. She smiled, relieved that he didn't realize what she was reading about although, she knew deep down he couldn't possibly understand.

"Where you going Ty?" Brooke called after him and returned to grab her hand.

"Come on." He pulled on her and she laughed, once again setting her book down as she stood to be led across the house.

They ended up in the playroom where Tyler let go of her hand and headed straight for his toddler sized basketball hoop. She stood against the door jam, watching him play the game his father and uncle had loved so much. It was funny the way Tyler loved it without even knowing how much it meant.

Brooke slipped away for a minute to grab her cell phone and book from the living room before returning to the playroom so she could keep an eye on Tyler while he played. She curled herself up into the rocking chair she had used so often when he was a baby and while he played, she read, determined to get through this book and find out exactly what Lucas had written.

"Our first date was less a date than it was a chance meeting of two people who happen to be in the right place at the right time. She arrived with Peyton. I arrived with Haley. If our best friends had known then what would become of our relationship, I'm sure they would have never left us alone in the first place." Lucas wrote, "Haley had dragged me to the burning boat festival that year so she could burn what she was calling her 'old life' and I called her 'normal life'. She wanted to start over for senior year and this was her way of doing it."

"The four of us stood at the boat together, all of us sort of glancing back and forth from one another, no one sure of what to say and no one wanting to be the first to throw their items into the boat."

Brooke sighed, her own memory reminiscing on that night as she read Lucas's version of the events. Peyton had ended up going first, tossing in a book of her sketches, the one's that depicted the life she wished she had with her parents. This was right after her parents had told her they were getting a divorce, although at the time, Lucas hadn't known that little fact.

After Peyton had thrown in her sketches she turned to Lucas and told him matter-of-factly it was his turn so he'd tossed in the name tag from his varsity basketball jersey, the one he had only barely earned the right to wear. I had laughed when I saw it. Peyton throwing in sketches of her parents. Lucas throwing in his father's last name. Following the pattern, I threw in my credit cards.

"I introduced myself to them as if I had no idea who they were and they had no idea who I was, although that was definitely not the case." Lucas wrote in his book, "I had been admiring Brooke Davis my entire life."

"I gotta pee pee." Tyler announced, drawing Brooke's attention from the book.

"Alright. Come on." She took Tyler to the bathroom and as was their routine, when he used the toilet instead of his diaper, he got a reward, "You want a cookie or a popsicle?"

"Popsicle!" He jumped up and down happily as Brooke reached into the freezer to get him a popsicle and then handed it to him so he could eat it, "Yummy, yummy, yummy."

Brooke laughed while Tyler chanted and ate at the same time. It was such a random thing, but she loved watching him eat his food because he always seemed so happy just to have that simple necessity of food in front of him. Whether it was popsicles or cookies or fruit or his favorite, chicken nuggets, he made happy sounds and happy faces as he ate anything.

"Is that a good popsicle?" Brooke asked.

Tyler nodded and held it out, offering Brooke a lick.

"No, you eat it. Thank you though."

Tyler shrugged and went back to enjoying while Brooke continued to watch with amusement.

When the popsicle was finished, and his face was cleaned, they headed back into the playroom where Tyler resumed his play and Brooke resumed reading. She continued through the night of her first date with Lucas and just as it had that night, her stomach fluttered and her heart swelled when Lucas recounted their time together.

"When I was little, I had a nanny who used to make me hot chocolate with marshmallows but only if I had gotten a gold star on my homework from school, so I used to work extra hard to make sure I got that gold star because I loved hot chocolate." Lucas recounted a story she had told him as they walked on the docks the night of that burning boat festival.

Brooke remembered that he had stared at her after she told him the story, as if he were staring into her soul. A smile had spread across his face and then he had told her his mom had done the same thing for him.

"It's probably why I still love hot chocolate so much." He had told her that night, "It reminds me of nights with my mom growing up."

"I like it because it reminds me that if I work hard at something, there's going to be a reward for me at the end, even something as simple as hot chocolate." Brooke had responded.

They reached the end of the dock, the hot chocolate in their hands warming them but the heat from each other's bodies warming them more. Lucas had looked down at Brooke, watching her watch the ripples of the river lap against the rocks below and he knew then that she was it for him. He had kissed her and from that moment on they were inseparable.

"Too bad the bliss only lasted a year." Brooke sighed, looking up from the pages to check on Tyler, "Hey baby boy, you want some help with that puzzle?"

"No." Tyler refused her help and she laughed, not expecting that answer as she watched him try to fit the pieces of a wooden puzzle together.

"Okay, but if you change your mind, I'm right here."

It didn't take long for Brooke to reach the part of the book when Lucas's addiction began. She knew how it happened really but she hoped he hadn't written all the details in the book. If he had written about her trying to get Clothes Over Bros off the ground while he and Peyton were snorting away the future, it would seriously change the way her company was currently being run.

"Brooke had a dream and while I had known about her dream, I hadn't expected it to come to fruition so soon. I found myself a few days after graduation already feeling her slip away. Nathan and Haley were busy with Jamie. Brooke was working on her clothing line. This left Peyton, already a social cocaine user, and me, unsure of what my future held. This was the night my addiction began."

All of the gory details were retold in the pages of the book. Things that she had already known and things she hadn't. Her heart broke all over again when he wrote about their fights and the way he had felt like she was pushing him away. She wished she had told him the way she had felt in those times so he could have written about her side as well, but nothing painted her in a bad light. He wrote about the three years of hell they had gone through together almost as if he did know how she felt. The words reached out to her.

Later that night, after dinner and bath time, she tucked Tyler into his bed and kissed him goodnight, watching him from the door as his eyes fluttered closed. From engrossing herself in Lucas's book all day, she was starting to wonder if it was possible he had really changed this time and if he had, should she expose her son to him?

In the book, she had come to the day when Peyton had told him he had a son. Brooke knew from the pages prior that he really had been sober for six months up to that point, so she wondered how and why Peyton had found him with cocaine that day.

"I came so close to learning the truth about my son the day that Peyton Sawyer returned to my doorstep. She seemed nervous to be knocking on my door while I walked up the sidewalk towards the house. She didn't realize I wasn't home and for a moment, I considered walking the other way. Had she been knocking at my door one day earlier, I would have gladly walked up to the door and embraced her, happy to see a friend and happier still to hear the things she wanted to tell me. That day though… That day I had failed to be the person I was trying to be. The man who was worthy of Brooke Davis and worthy to be a father. While I hadn't actually used it yet, a small recently purchased vial of cocaine was sitting in my pocket like a time bomb."

Brooke held her breath as she continued to read.

"See, I had realized that morning that by all calculations, Brooke would have given birth by that time. She left me when she was six weeks pregnant and even though I hadn't been in the state of mind to get her back at the time, I had made a calendar of when my child would be born and the due date on that calendar was more than a week past due. When I realized that I had missed the birth of my child, I became weak and I went out to buy something that would help me forget."

"Peyton asked me if I was clean and instinctively my hands went deep into my pockets, finding the vial and clutching it, as if somehow if I held it, it would disappear. It would no longer be there, but sticking my hands in my pockets was probably the second dumbest thing I had done that day. After she told me I had a son I rejoiced, pulling my hands from my pockets and with them the vial which fell to the floor."

Brooke frowned. He hadn't used the cocaine but it had been revealed he had it which was clearly why Peyton hadn't told him the whole story. It was only that tiny vial of cocaine which had allowed her these last two years to live in peace. She wasn't sure if she was happy or sad about that.

"As soon as Peyton saw it she retreated, leaving me without a chance of finding my son. My hopes had been revived and crushed all in one instant. One single moment, like so many single moments before, and yet much more poignant. I relapsed. I used the vial and then I went to my best friend and brother, the only family I had left, for some sort of support. Any comfort they could give me so I could once again find my way to sobriety, but they too, turned me away."

"It took me three more months to realize that I had to stop. There's a point, I believe, in every addicts life when you realize you have lost everything and you have two choices. You can either work really hard to get everything back and hope it's not too late or you can give up, and let it all go, drowning in your addiction and eventually choosing death above life. Even though she didn't realize it, Brooke helped me to make that decision as I remembered what she had said about hot chocolate four years earlier. 'I like it because it reminds me that if I work hard at something, there's going to be a reward for me at the end, even something as simple as hot chocolate.' I knew if I worked hard to kick my habit, I could earn my reward, even if it was just hot chocolate."

A tear fell down her cheek and Brooke quickly wiped it away, reading on through Lucas's words.

"Having repeatedly tried to stop using before, I realized it was time to bring in the professionals. I entered rehab where I spent the next year of my life and a year might seem like a long time, but when you consider that abusing cocaine had consumed the previous three years of my life, I felt it was a reasonable amount of time to spend ridding my life of my addiction."

Brooke read through the steps of rehabilitation and with every detail of the painful process she cried a little harder. He had started with detoxification which he described in every gory detail of what he remembered, admitting there were things he forgot. The nausea, vomiting, and shakiness were just the beginning. The cravings didn't stop and he found himself having dreams about using drugs and there were days when he felt like he couldn't continue without the drugs, but a year later, he returned home, and he was a better person for all of his trials.

"Haley and Nathan slowly began to let me see Jamie again and I began to regain their trust. My nephew was a huge part of a world that I needed. A world I was working hard to get back to because my addiction had poisoned it before. Every relationship that I mended brought me one step closer to Brooke. One step closer to being the dad I had always hoped to be."

Brooke realized she was near the end of the book and she cringed, knowing that it was going to end on a bittersweet note. While reading about all the trials, any normal reader would have expected to read that he had regained Brooke's trust and had become the father he wanted to be. She knew that wasn't the way it was going to end though.

"Every single day is still a battle and I expect it will be for the rest of my life. I continue on and will continue on for as long as it takes because the love I hold for Brooke Davis and the love I hold for the son I do not yet know will never go away. They are the hot chocolate."

Brooke closed the book and set in on her nightstand, turning out her light and bundling herself underneath her blankets. Having finished the book she knew what she was going to have to do now. She had a book signing to attend the next day.


	5. Chapter 5

_**Author's Note: Oh my God! Thank you all so much for your reviews! I'm so amazed that you all like this story so much and your reviews inspired me to get this chapter written so I'm posting it now. :) I like the way it came out so I hope you all do too. Don't hesitate to critique it if you think somethings wrong but also, if you like something, I love hearing about it. As always, enjoy :)  
**_

**Chapter Five**

Brooke stood in front of the bathroom mirror fidgeting with her hair for the hundredth time that morning. She started with it up, then down, then half up, ponytail, curly and she was still messing with it despite being ten minutes late already.

"You pretty." Tyler sat on the bathroom counter staring up at her as she finally settled for leaving her hair down in long waves.

"Thank you baby." Brooke leaned forward and kissed his forehead then scooped him off the counter.

As soon as his feet hit the floor he was off and running across the house, giggling as Brooke chased him.

"Alright, I am off. You have my cell phone number if you need me."

"Oui." The petite blonde babysitter nodded.

"And I'm just right around the corner so I can be back in minutes if something happens."

"Okay."

"Um…" Brooke frowned as if she were trying to remember something that she was forgetting, "Okay, I'm leaving. Ty, give me a kiss."

Tyler ran to her and wrapped himself around her legs, staring up at her with a gigantic smile across his face.

"I love you." Brooke leaned down and grabbed his cheeks playfully forcing him to pucker while she gave him a kiss, "Be good for Jenay alright?"

"Okay!" Tyler once again took off running and Brooke sighed, looking over at her teenage babysitter one more time.

"Seriously, I'm…"

"Right around ze corner." Jenay smiled, "Don't worry Brooke. I will take good care of him."

Brooke wondered if she was making a mistake. Going to Lucas's book signing? Was she stupid or just naïve? The book had been good but it didn't mean he was telling the truth. Three of the four years they had been together he was lying to her. How could she possibly think this was going to be any different?

"Go." Jenay ushered her towards the door laughing, "Go before I make you go."

Her French accent made her hard to understand sometimes but Brooke understood that line completely. She laughed and obliged, heading for the front door. She stood still for a second, taking a deep breath before she began to walk. She was officially on her way. There could be no turning back now.

The line at the bookstore was almost as long as her walk. Hundreds of people clutching their copies of Lucas's book stood, waiting patiently to meet the author and have their books signed. She gulped and clutched her own copy, afraid that if she had to wait, her will to stay wouldn't survive as long as the line.

"Brooke! You came!" The bookshop owner smiled at her as she handed out samples of coffee to the patrons waiting in line, "Come inside. You don't have to wait in line. You work here."

Brooke was confused for a second and then her friend winked at her and she understood. If it looked like she worked at the store the patrons couldn't get upset that she was getting special treatment.

"Where's Tyler?"

"I left him at home with a babysitter." Brooke bit her lower lip nervously as they approached the entrance of the store, "I figured he wouldn't make it through the long line although I guess, if I work here, he wouldn't have had to wait."

"You're my best customer. How could I make you wait and besides, you know him right?"

Brooke nodded slowly as they entered the shop and although her friend continued to talk, all sound ceased except the sound of her heart beating faster and faster, her eyes landing directly on Lucas Scott sitting across the shop, no more than thirty feet away from her. She wasn't sure what to do with him in the same room after such a long time. She almost turned to run back out of the shop but then his eyes connected with hers and her feet rooted themselves to the spot.

"Excuse me for one second." Lucas smiled at the lady who was next in line to have her book signed as he stood up from his seat, his eyes never leaving the woman standing at the front of the store, for fear that if he looked away, she would be gone.

It took no more than 15 long strides and he was next to her, his heart thumping in his chest as if it wanted to escape.

"Are you really here right now?"

Brooke smiled, trying to hide the confusion and nervousness that were running through her brain. She nodded but didn't say a word.

"I can't believe this. Brooke, I…"

"You have a book signing to finish." She motioned to the waiting fans and he shook his head, looking straight into her eyes.

"They can wait. I can't go back to that when I finally have you standing right here in front of me. I've been looking for you."

"I know." Brooke sighed, "I read the book and I think we have a lot to talk about so you go do your book signing and I'm not going anywhere."

"You promise?" Lucas knew that if he walked away in this moment and she wasn't there when he came back, he would never forgive himself.

"I promise." Brooke nodded towards the line, "Go sign books. I'll wait."

Lucas fought with the decision but ultimately he decided he had to go sign the books. That was what he was in Paris to do and so he had to do it. Brooke promised to wait and he trusted her. She hadn't broken a promise to him yet.

"Brooke Davis." The store owner sidled up alongside Brooke again and grinned, "I knew you were the girl from the book."

"You read it?" Brooke's mouth fell open, "You said you hadn't!"

"No, I said I heard it was a great book." She grinned devilishly, "Since you're sticking around to talk to him anyway, you mind helping me hand out samples?"

Brooke laughed and shrugged.

"I guess I can."

Two hours and 300 coffee samples later, Brooke fell into a chair at a tiny table overlooking the street outside the window. The last book was being signed and she knew that her time to talk to Lucas was looming. Suddenly she was realizing she had no idea what she was going to say.

If he asked about Tyler, would she tell him? Would she admit they lived in Paris or would she say she was visiting? Would she even tell him that Tyler was in town with her or would she lie and say Tyler was somewhere else? There were a lot of possibilities to go with and she still hadn't settled on one when Lucas slid into the chair across from her and set a cup in front of her.

"I thought this might be appropriate." He nudged the cup forward and she took it in her hands, the warmth of the cup oozing into her skin, "It's hot chocolate."

She smiled at him and took a sip, letting the warmth seep into her soul. Before she said a word she reached into her purse and pulled out the book she had bought only the day before, sliding it across the table towards Lucas.

"Will you sign mine?"

Lucas smiled at her and nodded, clicking the end of the pen he still held in his hand as he opened to the inside cover and began to write. It took him a few minutes then he closed the book and slid it back towards her, keeping his hand on top of it so she couldn't pick it up.

"Don't read it yet." He said simply, "First, just talk to me."

Brooke took a deep breath, holding her cup of hot chocolate up in front of her face so he could only see her eyes. She wasn't sure where to start. She had no idea what to say.

"I don't know what to say." She finally admitted, "I um, I liked the book. It was sweet, the way you wrote about us and I guess it was good for me to see the other side of things. See your point of view on the drugs. It helped me to understand a bit of what you were going through during our relationship."

"I hoped it would." Lucas reached out and lowered the cup so he could see her whole face, "I wrote that book specifically with the intent that wherever you were you would read it and maybe see my side enough to talk to me. I know I screwed up Brooke but…"

"Don't." Brooke stopped him before he could continue, "Don't apologize and don't make excuses okay? I didn't come here for that. I just wanted to see you. I wanted you to know that I read it and that I forgive you. For everything."

"I owe you so many apologies though Brooke. I really screwed this up. I took the love that you offered me and I discarded it like it meant nothing but it means everything. You and our son…"

"Stop." Brooke groaned, "Lucas, please stop. I told you, I forgive you okay? You don't owe me anything."

Lucas frowned, studying Brooke for a second and the pained expression on her face. It was one he had seen a million times before. She always got the same look when she didn't believe he was telling her the truth. She wanted him to believe that she believed him, but she didn't and he could see it written all over her face.

"Did you really read it?" Lucas asked, the pain now evident in his own eyes.

"Of course I read it." Brooke's eyebrows furrowed together as she stared at him incredulously, "If I told you I read it then I did. I've never lied to you."

"Then why are you still looking at me like that? Like nothing I'm telling you can possibly be the truth. If you read it you should know that I've changed."

Brooke took a deep breath and nodded slowly.

"The character in the book changed." She said as she stared at him, "But those are just words on a page Lucas. They're just like the words that come out of your mouth. They could easily just be lies."

It took all his restraint not to start screaming at her in that moment. If he had, it would have been the addict part of him screaming, not the version of himself he had become. The Lucas who had spent a year in rehab and another year just working his butt off to make himself the kind of person he hoped Brooke could love again, that Lucas realized she was still speaking through her own pain and he accepted the blame for that.

"Brooke, I know I hurt you." Lucas reached out and took her hands in his own, clutching them between his palms, "I'm so sorry for hurting you and for lying to you for three years. I'm not the same person now okay? I changed and I know you have no reason to believe that. You're right. The words written in my book could all be lies just like the lies I told you when we were together, but please give me a chance to prove they're not."

"I can't do that." Brooke pulled her hands out of his grasp and looked away from him, to the people outside who walked past with no recognition of the events taking place inside. She wanted to be one of those people.

"Why can't you do that?" Lucas groaned, slapping his hands to his forehead in frustration.

"Because I have more than just me to worry about here Lucas." Brooke replied, adding more attitude to the sentence then she had meant to, "Remember the little boy that you supposedly love so much that you wrote about in your book? The one you don't know? I have to worry about him, and his feelings, and they way he'll feel after getting to know you only to be disappointed over and over and over again."

"I won't disappoint him." Lucas said before he even thought about the depth of the pledge, "I won't disappoint you anymore. I've worked so hard and I've come so far. You're sitting right here in front of me. I can't let you slip away now. I promise Brooke, I won't disappoint you anymore."

"Are you sure about that?" Brooke raised an eyebrow at him, "You'll never promise to make it to one of his basketball games and then never show? You'll never tell me you'll be somewhere at a certain time and then show up late? You'll never forget a birthday, or a holiday, or an anniversary or any special occasion at all? Because maybe those all seem like little things but let me tell you, from experience, they add up. When every single time you tell me you'll be there and you don't show, or you show late, or you simply forget, those are disappointments. I dealt with it for three years and I won't subject my son to that."

"Give me a chance Brooke. I will prove to you that I can stop disappointing you. I can break the cycle."

Brooke found herself staring deep into Lucas's eyes, trying to read him. She wanted to see it there, a plainly written declaration that he was either lying or telling the truth, but she couldn't find it. She saw desperation, hope, and maybe a glimmer of love but nothing that said "I'm telling the truth."

"You can't believe my words." Lucas said simply before Brooke could say anything about giving him another chance, "You said it yourself. Whether written or spoken, they could all just be lies so you have to let me show you. Actions speak louder than words and I swear to you, I can prove that I deserve this chance."

Brooke contemplated him for a minute. She had never seen him this way before, not even in the year before he had started doing drugs. She wanted to believe him, but just like the story of the boy who cried wolf, she had been tricked so many times by him, she wasn't sure she wanted to even risk it this time.

"How long are you in Paris?" Brooke asked, not committing to anything but not refusing either.

"Just a few days." Lucas replied, unsure what the correct answer would be to that question.

"When does your book tour end?"

"Two months."

Brooke nodded, watching him, trying to find anything in the way he looked at her, in the way he talked or in the way he moved that would give her a real inclination towards whether she should trust him or not.

"Alright, here's my card." Brooke dug through her purse and found one of her business cards, sliding it across the table towards him, "Call me when your book tour is over and you have at least three months of spare time. If you can't find three months of spare time then don't call me. It will take at least that long for you to even attempt to prove to me that you're trustworthy."

"Wait." Lucas frowned, "Why can't I start now? I'm here for three more days and only one of them do I have any obligations. Why do I have to wait until I have three months of spare time?"

"Because, like I said, it's going to take at least that long for me to even begin to trust you again and there is no way in hell I'm making this easy on you. You want to fix this, you'll do it on my terms. Take it or leave it."

Lucas debated. With a best seller, he was probably looking at it being awhile before he had three solid months of time off. There were always book signings, book tours, press and of course, the next book. His deal was for three books, not one so he had two more to write.

"It's just bad timing Brooke." Lucas sighed, "I have so much going on with the book and press for the book and I have to write two more books… I just don't know when I'm going to have three months free."

Brooke smiled as she nodded. He watched her take a deep breath and then begin to gather her things.

"Wait, where are you going?" Lucas stood up before she could, hoping that he could find some way to make her stay, "I'll do it. I'll make it happen. Please don't go."

"Parenting lesson one." Brooke stood toe to toe with Lucas, the closest she had been to him in years, "Your child ALWAYS comes first no matter what obligations you may have."

Brooke caught him off guard as she reached over and retracted her business card from his hand.

"Consider my offer officially revoked. Good luck with the book. It was really good."

She started to walk away leaving Lucas speechless for a moment as he fell into his chair completely dejected. He had her in front of him and once again she was slipping away. He had no more knowledge of his son then he'd had when he showed up and Brooke still wanted nothing to do with him. He'd failed. He had written the book to find her and when he found her he lost her all over again. A single tear fell down his cheek and he frowned as he wiped it away. He couldn't let her go like that.

"Brooke!"

Brooke stopped just short of the bookstore door and turned back to look at Lucas as he stood by the table they had just been sitting at together.

"I have the rest of my life free starting right now. Is that long enough?"

She watched him pull out his cell phone and hold it up as if he were about to dial. He began to walk towards her but she found she couldn't make herself walk away.

"It only takes one call to my agent to get this book tour canceled. One call to my publisher to let them know that I'm going to have to quit which means I will also have to pay back the advance they gave me for the next two books but seeing that this book is a best seller, I have the money for that now." Lucas stood directly in front of Brooke staring her straight in the eye, "Two phone calls and then the rest of my life is yours. I will never be late again. I will never have an obligation to get in my way. I will never forget another important date ever, if you will please just… don't walk out on me again. I need you."

Brooke stared into his eyes for what seemed to be the millionth time that night. This time she could see he was telling the truth. This wasn't a bluff.

"Where are you staying while you're in town?" She asked.

"The Pulitzer Paris hotel, room 15."

"Be ready for dinner at 8. I'll pick you up."

"Okay." Lucas began to dial a number on his phone but Brooke grabbed it before he could press send, "What are you doing?"

"Don't cancel your life Lucas." She said simply, clearing out the number he had just started to dial, and handing him back his phone, "It's the thought that counts."

Before he could say another word she left the bookstore and walked briskly down the block, turning at the corner to make sure he hadn't followed her. When she saw he hadn't followed, she continued to walk and finally let out a breath she had been holding since she started to walk away.

Her brain was having a hard time wrapping itself around the concept that she was letting Lucas Scott back into her life but she was, and there was no turning back now.


End file.
